Immeasurable Hurt

A permanent feeling of being unwanted 
The lonely pangs have resurfaced…
Tear stained face, heaving shuddering breaths
No romantic prospects
Doors, windows, trap doors
All slammed shut and sealed
No one can help me from my suffering
Old friends, new friends, family alike 
Talking to them doesn’t help
Shame to have their love but feel this way
No option but to withdraw into myself
Constant rejection has scarred me
I am not the happy person I once knew
Those distant memories are like a dream
Locked away in shyness, I had hope 
When I broke free all would be well
Blissful naïveté maintained me
I never envisioned the actuality
Removed from my cage the horror befell
Rampant mistreatment: lied to, ignored, used, abandoned
I don’t understand any of it
No one can argue that I ever deserved it
But life is not fair; lesser people prosper
Nothing to do but keep on trucking
Perhaps there is an unforeseen gentleman
Oh, how I wish…

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