Dispirited

It doesn’t matter what I do,
How I occupy myself
Without the human connection
That I’ve always sought
Sure, my existence has meaning…for others
I always help those that cross my path
It never takes much effort to be kind
But true happiness eludes me
Yes, there are pockets of happy moments
But they quickly pass
People love me, yes I know
But it’s not enough
I’m not being greedy; it’s just how I feel
Growing up in ignorance I was happy
I fully believed the future held the promise 
Now time has passed, far more than I ever imagined
I’ve replaced my naïveté with knowledge
A double edged sword of pain
No longer idyllic fantasies;
Useless hopes, wishes, dreams
What I once thought and held most dear has crumpled:
True love is a lie
I can only will the tears to stop…
Painted two years ago. Seems silly now… Perhaps I subconsciously knew; I never did sign it.
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3 thoughts on “Dispirited

  1. We do get discouraged about love as we get older, but that’s only because we’re brought up thinking that true love has to be like a fairy tale. True love is hard, frustrating, and complicated, but it exists. Don’t give up on it!

    Liked by 1 person

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